“Now it was a bit disorienting to consider that Los Angeles did not exist—except on Facebook or if I picked up the phone, and even then only as pixels on my computer or sounds in my receiver.” – T Bunzel

One of the great benefits of beginning to see one’s mind as an instrument rather than as one’s “self” is the ability to recognize patterns and to make changes. While the question of “who” is actually making any changes (free will) remains a mystery—or rather when it becomes a mystery, amazing things can happen.

I have lived (or rather I had lived) in Los Angeles for 35 years, having moved there from the east coast in 1979 to pursue a fantasy of fame and fortune in the film business. Over those years I had made friendships, some that dissipated and others that strengthened, and gotten extremely comfortable with my environment – I lived in 3 apartments and one condo within a square mile area near my park and tennis courts, restaurants, dry cleaners, doctor and so on.

But the cost of living in LA, particularly rent, and my own changing circumstances, made me reconsider this comfort zone. And in fact the prospect of leaving caused me some anxiety—the “voice in my head,” in trying to protect me insisted that I was “safest” by staying put. In fact at my lowest point even travel seemed scary. But I remember a Skype session with Ben Smythe, a teacher who travels widely who made me aware that my sense of control within my comfort zone was an illusion.  It was the habit of familiarity that made me feel safe but the future was still completely unknown and by no means guaranteed. Continue reading →