Zen-Haven July 19 2013
The way to eliminate the weight or anguish of your life quickly is to begin to discipline and control the ego. There is no emotional pain that is not ego-driven. We don’t want to eliminate the ego completely. Otherwise we’d be wandering
around the house each morning, drinking coffee for hours, saying “Who the hell am I?” We need the ego to sustain a sense of identity.
However, if you’ll start by calling ego’s bluff, and understanding the games it gets you into, you can develop strategies for managing things better. You really don’t need any qualification or high-powered university degree to understand the psychology of the ego’s machinations. Its ways are predictable and easy to understand.
Watch when it suckers you into importance. Stifle it when it seeks more and more gratification. Ignore it when it offers a hundred questions. Answer most of its questions — let it know that you’re not interested and that you just don’t care.
When you experience frustration, look for the vision that’s denied. Look at the time frames you’ve invested that vision with. Develop patience. If you see yourself as an infinite being, you have all eternity. You can wait forever if needs be.
When angry, look for the loss. When you’re sad, also look for the loss — sadness is just another manifestation of the same reaction. It’s OK to be sad sometimes. Just agree to whatever loss is making you sad, then look for freshness and beauty and the life force. Happiness returns in a moment.
Remember, all mental weight comes from the interaction of two or more opposing forces in your mind — your reaction to circumstance, and your opinion or desire. You can fix most of the contradictions by controlling circumstances better and learning not to react when they don’t suit. If you have less resistance, your opinions and desires will be less rigid. You’ll learn to flow through life rather than fight your way along.