Meredith Murphy | March 19 2012
At times it’s hard to feel your connection to anything.
Life seems unbearably challenging. You wake up even at the dawn of the new day with a sense of unhappiness, dissatisfaction, frustration, even anger. This is part of life evolving–these feelings come to the surface. They are triggered by our relationships. They’re fed by what we think about. They’re deepened by our time spent revisiting some memories.
When we’re in one of these experiences, it can feel all encompassing. It can feel like there is no way out. No path that is not filled with unyielding experiences.
When this feeling has gone on a while and as the mornings have come and gone, it has not lifted, it’s easy to lose your orientation. You might even begin to feel just angry and outraged by the whole thing.
All of this just continues to stir up the muck. And yet, even knowing this, when you’re in this space, that doesn’t help. It seems like nothing helps. There is no searching that frees you. You lose your faith in asking for help. You stop calling upon angels and your higher self. You may not even feel their presence anymore and again, you find yourself astonishingly, seemingly, not connected to anything.
In truth, you are one with the vastness of being, the divine realm from which you and all life is continually emerging. Yet you don’t feel this. And it is feeling this and living as this knowing that is what we’re evolving toward. You know this and you are committed to this and the reality that you can’t get there right now, only increases your suffering.
When we find ourselves in just such a depressing, thwarting state of being, it’s really good to just slow down. To not worry about the fact that it seems like we’ll never be happy. To not fuel the anger, but to sink into it. To become deeply intimate with it all. Yuck? Why yes. Uber-yuck. Yet it is by allowing ourselves to acknowledge what is happening, that we begin to reinstate our wholeness, and our alignment with ourselves.